"isn't that just 10 dollars?!"

I begin this post with a quote mom must have said at least 15 times while she was visiting me in Sweden, and this is just one example of the many things we giggled over during the big VISIT. I realize i'm writing this note too long after the event, and now it feels like old news. I always do that. As I walk along the street I come up with a great little piece of writing in my head, a nice combination of words, a philosophical thought that passes through my mind, thinking i'll go straight to the computer when I get home and jot it down for the blog world to read, but then i forget to, and the thought leaves me, and whatever brilliant thing that was there is now gone and I feel i have nothing to report.

well anyway, here i am now. it's better than nothing. So....3 (or was it 4?) weeks ago my beloved mother and sister visited me, came all the way to Sweden to see me and my Swedish life. I felt really loved and special the whole 8 days they were here, just thinking of the effort it took them to make it to my little house. I found mom at the airport, head down on the cafe table, worn out like a child from the flight. We then strolled around for a few hours, awkwardly pushing mom's 2 huge suitcases through the touristy airport stores as we waited for Becca, whose flight from NY landed 4 hours later than mom's from charlotte.

How can i quickly summarize the visit?
Awful weather.
But good spirits.
Long walks in the green, mossy, evergreen forest.
Laughing at mom and Alexander playing together as she spoke English to him and he responded in Swedish, and they got along beautifully. Even when mom said "ja!" in affirmation as he said "Jag har en ont här." (I have a boo-boo here)
Becca's papper and stubby pencil kept in her pocket to write down "all the Swedish words i know"
Oohs and ahhs over cute red houses.
Mmms and yumms over hot strong coffee and tasty cafe treats.
Window shopping at the expensive stores.
Buying fun foreign cheap things at the 2nd hand stores.
Splurging on the purchase of beautiful yarn.
Getting knitting help and inspiration from Becca.
Laughing like loud americans on the city streets.
Giggling at night in my tiny room.
Meeting a small organic farmer in the middle of nowhere.
He had a wooden bowl filled with fresh brown eggs in his farm store.
Delicious dinners hosted by wonderful friends and "family" here.
Semlor!
A visit to the Carl Larsson home where we feasted our eyes on an artist's work who adored his family and home and made it beautiful.
Biking everywhere.
Through the forest.
Lingering in the grocery store and wishing america had a better cheese and yogurt selection.
Calculating the currency conversion constantly and in the end deciding we should compare every purchase to our 60 kr. kebab because, if a kebab is only 60 kr then shouldn't we buy this (shirt, yarn, candle holder, etc) since it's only (100, 200, etc) kronor?
Me remembering that I have the most gracious and wonderful mom and sister ever.

and so much more!!


Now i'm busy growing little plants for the community garden plot Erik and I have just aquired, learning to play the fiddle, planning our summer trip to farms in Italy, trying to plan next year, making new friends, and training for a half marathon in May! yikes.

anticipation

I can hardly wait for tomorrow morning. I will wake up, feel excitement in my belly, eat a quick breakfast, put on something cute, and drive to the airport. There i will find my mamma, sitting at an airport cafe (having arrived very early) and we will be reunited, mother and daughter, friends together again. I will bring her breakfast and we will sit with her big black bags until we are reunited with our dearest, darling, we-miss-her-so-much sister and daughter BECCA who is arriving around noon. I feel already that this trip will be so encouraging for all 3 of us. And that it will be for lack of a better way to put it...a woman's trip...a time for being with women, giggling as women, talking as women, appreciating everything as women. Often I think all three of us wish we were like some families who settle near each other, who visit often , who can drive over for a weekend or come by for a sunday lunch after church. But we're not...somehow Becca ended up in Minnesota and now NY, I met someone from Sweden and have followed him here...and we find ourselves in different corners of the world instead of different parts of a state or city. But this is us. This is the life God has led us to. And it means we communicate a lot on the phone and through emails, and we have these visits which are not so frequent but when they happen are a whirlwind of fun and excitement.

Today there is much to do....final planning, fixing bikes for use next week, mopping kitchen floors and finishing building my cold frames so my garden doesn't look like a construction site! The first flower opened up outside my door yesterday, just in time, and it's as if it knew someone special was arriving. :) It's small and yellow and perfect. I love spring. The picture above is flowers from Becca's farm at mid-summer, when flowers have their time of glory. I can only stare at that now and think...does that really happen? do these little plants really burst with color and out of a tiny seed become something so amazing with such detailed beauty? in the winter things seem hopelessly dead, beyond revival, but i know that soon there will be renewal. ressurection.

looking out the window

That's not me in the photo, or my window, and i didn't take the picture, just to put that out there. But i am looking through MY window, and the view is much cuter anyway, with some apple trees (albeit sleeping right now), raspberry plants, and pines and birches across the street. (I don't have a digital camera so it's tough to put picutres of myself or Sweden up on my blog. I ought to get with the times i suppose and buy one, but the cost stops me)

So, to back up, the Swedish family I live with moved a few weeks ago to a new house about 15 minutes by bike from our old one. This new house (called by more than more person "a carl larsson home") is a better fit for the family, and for me it is an immeasurably better situation. My old room was dark, in the basement, and not a place I wanted to spend time in. Now i have my own apartment, so to speak; a separate wing of the house with my own entrance and small hallway, my own kitchen, my own bike parking spot outside and tulips coming up by the door. If you haven't caught own, the feeling of having my "own" space has been good and helped me feel more independent here. Erik and I appreciate having dinners on our own, here and at the adorably small studio apartment he just moved into. This Spring has felt full of nice, fresh changes and as the light grows longer and the weather warmer, I begin to feel more at home here in Uppsala, with my life here in this new country. My Swedish is improving and I can hang onto conversations better and laugh with others (legitimately, not half-heartedly while thinking did i really get that joke?:) Our backdoor opens onto the city forest which is a gorgeous area full of trails, one titled "troll trail" which goes through an area completely untouched for the last 40 years and is thus full of beautiful decaying trees which display the amazing life cycle the forest. I love winding my way through the trails on my bike, then popping out on the other side in downtown Uppsala. I signed up for a half-marathon recently which is in May in Stockholm, and it feels good to have something motivating me to get out the door to run, something i always enjoy once i'm out there but which is somehow tough to start doing. Also, Erik and I are getting to know folks better here and are feeling spiritually fed by a wonderful international Bible study that is concerned with not only what we know about God but that we love others because of God's love for us.

To give some recap for the month of February: I celebrated my 23rd birthday on the 11th, and it was a pleasant day filled with Swedish celebrations here as well as calls and packages from home. The move happened= BIG accomplishment. I began growing lettuce in egg cartons in my sunniest windows, and I'm building a cold frame from old windows to set the transplants in once they are big enough. I am biking on a new (old) bike that I fixed up and so now no longer need to borrow Hanna's "mom" bike here unless I need the baby seat to carry Alexander on. (I just laughed at the though that if HE knew i just referred to his bike seat as something for a BABY he would most definitley get extremely defensive and declare what a "stor kille" (big guy) he was to me, complete with a visual display of him climbing on the tallest kitchen chair to show how tall he is. :) I love my new bike, and though it only has one gear, it is the fastest bike ever, and i'm constantly effortlessly passing Erik when we bike to town together. tehe. i call it blixten because it is as fast as a lightning flash, and because i like the sound of the word. :)

I have been reflective lately, thinking about what life means and what is important. Isn't it so easy to just breeze through the days consumed with the details and forgetting to ask what our real purpose is? I am convinced more every day that God created us for real relationships of love and joy....with Him and with each other, and that involves being involved with people....all kinds in all places. Our neighbors are next door and they are hungry children across the globe and women who are sold into prostitution in India. To love them means to pray, to act, to be aware of their situations and to do what we can about it. Life is short, often confusing, broken and yet being redeemed, a joy to live some days and a trial on others. I think these words from Isaiah 55 are beautiful..."Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!"

Mom and Becca arrive in one week! I'll try to write a post soon after their visit to record what i'm sure will be the best 10 days of the year. :) I hope all of you reading this remain well!

en konstig vinter

The translation of the title is "a strange winter" and yes, even for a newbie to Sweden like myself, I realize the oddness of seeing a snowdrop flower in January instead of in late March! I have heard of how much anticipation and longing there is here for the first sign of spring, and I was looking forward to experiencing this deprivation of life in winter followed by the glorious renewal of it in spring. Yet yesterday as I biked to pick up Alexander I spotted this beautiful white flower poking out of the ground, a lovely sight, but at the same time I want more snow and I hope we have a good month or so more of winter before the flowers bloom. It's funny how many times i've had such cravings here for blooming things, fresh smells, green lanscapes. Yet when it's not the right time, it feels like cheating.

I spent a truly wonderful 3 weeks of christmas holidays at home in SC with my family; cooking food with mom (winter recipes from our favorite seasonal cookbook! and collards from the garden!), walking with Caroline, playing monopoly with my brothers, dancing my feet off with Calvin, visiting grandparents and friends, soaking in the sun, running in shorts, and feeling a little culture shock at the bigness of the USA, the unappeal of having to drive everywhere, and yet immensly enjoying speaking English with everyone around me and appreciating the easygoing, kind personality of so many Americans. I have been back for a few weeks now. Nick Elliot, a friend of mine and "brother" to Erik was here when i arrived, and it was fun to spend a week with him. He has been to Sweden several times now and feels at home with Erik's family. It's been back to work for me for the most part here. Alexander is as cute as ever (i can't even describe how great it felt when he first saw me when i arrived back here on the buss....his face lit up and he couldn't contain screaming out my name and climbing up the buss steps in unabandoned desperation). He is talking more as each day passes and always teaching me something new. We (the family i live with) and I are moving soon to a beautiful old house across town which has been in the renovating process for several months now. It was a lot of work, but the house looks beautiful, a great blend of new and old design, and we all can't wait to be there! So I do a little packing every day and little by little things are moving out.

When I was home my best friend Cate and I made a "Spring Renewal" list as we considered heading back abroad (she to Madrid) and the changes we hoped to make in our lives. On both of our lists was learning to play an instrument, and I am (sort of) in the process of finding a fiddle and someone to teach me to play it. I also hope to do some extra babysitting this spring, join an international bible study, and improve my Swedish either through a course or more self-discipline! Also on the list was traveling.... Scandinavia is all so close, so Erik and I hope to visit Helsinki, take a train across Norway, and head north in Sweden where the landscape is quite different from here. Of course my #1 excitement these days is anticipating Mom and Becca's visit here on March 7th! I have refrained from making extremely detailed lists yet...like what to cook them for dinner all 10 nights they are here, but I can't wait to plan plan plan and get that lovely looking-forward-to-something-so-good feeling in me.

Hmm...i've been knitting some lately, nearly done with Alexander's sweater and 1/3 done with a blue cardigan for myself. I got some wonderful books for Christmas that I am enjoying....I've finished Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver and i highly recommend it to anyone, especially if you're interested in eating local food and growing a garden!! I will try to write more frequently and I hope all of you readers are doing well! i send love to all of you.

at the request of one of my most loyal readers....

I'll write just a quick note before I head home for Christmas. My flight is leaving from Stockholm at the wee hour of 6:30, which means i'm getting up around 3 am in only a few hours. But i'm packed and have my passport handy, and it'll be nice to be tired on the flight so maybe i can sleep a bit. I could never travel so often as some business folks do, but I can't help but get that excited travel-feeling in my belly and stride through the airports feeling like i'm seeing the whole world coming and going at once. PLUS, i'm going home to my family, and this is the best feeling of all. I've been gone since the end of the summer, and i'm feeling quite ready to simply BE with the ones i love most.

December has been a busy month, and we've celebrated 3 birthdays in this house in a matter of weeks. Alexander (now 3), Hanna (50.....huge awesome surprise party), and Fredricka (sweet 16). In Sweden the birthday kid (and adult) gets an early morning delivery in bed of breakfast and presents, and everyone jumps on the bed to watch you open them. This must be the best way to celebrate, at least from a child's perspective, because there are no long waits to open the presents. :) In addition to the birthday parties, we have been visiting friends here and drinking lots of glögg (hot wine) and eating lots of pepparkakor (gingerbread cookies) and Lussekatt (saffron buns) and other swedish goodies.

Today I was delighted to attend a real Christmas smörgåsbord, called a Julbord, at a beautiful turn of the century Swedish mansion. The whole Klum family plus Erik were invited, and I have never seen such a spread of food. I can't believe i forgot the camera because it was all so gorgeous and special. There were 6 kinds of herring, 6 kinds of salmon (all with special sauces), a huge spread of sausage and ham and other meat, pickles, beet salads, potatoes cooked 10 different ways (of course!), omlettes, bread, cheese, etc, etc, and a lovely dessert spread and typically good coffee and christmas beer. We sat at a long table with candles and a view outside, and halfway through our meal a Lucia procession entered our room and we were serenaded by 6 girls with beautiful voices in white robes with red sashes and candle wreathes on their heads. Saint Lucia day was actually on the 13th, but it is a Christmas thing in general, and it was very lovely to see. Alexander was spellbound and when they left our room he kept asking for the "anglarna" (the angels) to come back!

Well, i'm off to finish the last packing details. Lots of gifts are tucked into my suitcase and other fun Swedishy things to share with family. Of course I'll miss Erik so much, and I'll miss my other favorite boy Alexander (though he's promised to call, and i can't wait to hear his little Swedish voice on the telephone). God Jul!!

snowy, sunless days sow seeds of spring-longing

Ok, i'm not sure where that little diddy came from. I think i just wanted to ryhme, because actually I'm content and mostly delighted with the winter weather here in Sweden. Typical late November weather here is cold, cloudy, rainy (with some snow), and a 3:30 sunset. December should be better, with more snow brightening the landscape and with everyone wanting to be huddled inside around candles and fireplaces anyway. On December 21st the days start getting longer instead of shorter, and i'll be ready for it. The darkness makes me sleepy and gives me low-energy, and that can be tough. And mostly I just can't wait to place little seedlings in the ground and grow a garden again.

I feel i have some rather random things to say so i'll just dive in. One is that i wanted to say a late happy birthday to the beloved Astrid Lindgren, who turned 100 a couple weeks ago. In reality she died a few years ago, but her birthday is always celebratd in Sweden and other parts of the world. She created the books about the strong-willed and strong-muscled Pippi Långstrump (Pippi Longstockings), who if you don't remember, was able to lift her horse above her head with ease. :) Pippi was a little too bold for some of the readers in the man's world of the 1940s into which she was born, yet it's not surprising that she was born in Sweden since this country is still in many ways leading the world on issues of gender equality. (They were just voted number 1 in an annual ranking by a Swiss group which evaluates countries on the basis of gender equality. In case you're interested, the top countries after Sweden were Norway, Finland, and Iceland (go Scandinavia!:) Yeman was last, and the US was 31st, after Cuba and South Africa....hmm)

Anyway, Astrid Lindgren wrote many more wonderful children's tales which are worth reading and which I myself have on my long "have to read" list.

While I'm on the topic of children's books from Sweden I want to mention the artist of the beautiful painting at the top of my blog. His name is John Bauer and he illustrated many of the fairy tales that came out of Sweden one hundred years ago, which are unsurprisingly about mostly trolls and other forest creatures. I love how literature reflects the local, simple, everyday things which are common for each place it comes from. A Swedish story about little red mushroom children who live in a blueberry forest may seem exotic to an outsider but to anyone who has walked the paths of the forests here can easily see where these writers get their ideas. :) You can see more of Bauer's painints here if you're interested: http://bauer.artpassions.net/

December looks to be an exciting month for me, with the highlight of course being my trip home on December 17th, which will last for 3 long (hopefully) weeks and be filled with family, friends, and contradancing calvin's dance shoes right off his feet. But before then comes the start of Advent on the first Sunday in December, where everyone begins to light the advent candles and perhaps open a little gift every day before christmas. On December 10th the Nobel Prize ceremony comes to the palace in Stockholm where the king and queen of sweden hand out these famous prizes and all of Sweden watches a live broadcast of the gourmet dinner and ball held afterwards. On December 13th is Lucia (i'll tell more later), and in between all this there is lots of food and sweets.

Today I went sledding with Alexander and Erik, and I felt seriously like a kid again, where you are so excited about what you're doing you never take a walking (but only running) step and you find you can't get your words of delight out of your mouth without shouting them. It was a beautiful clear day, below the freezing point, and with a lovely icy snow on the ground. Now it's dark, and i think i'll go light some candles and work on my knitting.

nordic winter arrives

Last Saturday the first significant snow fell in Uppsala, and though I hope to have at least a few, ok even just one, more slightly temperate fall day before it's cold till April, the snow was still beautiful to behold. Alexander and I have been talking constantly about "när snö kommer, ska vi lager en snögubbe!!" So we dressed ourselves warmly and built 2 snowmen outside.....they were pretty amature since we were too lazy to gather anything more than sticks for the body parts, but i'm sure we'll have plently more opportunities to improve our skills in that department. The weather has indeed been cold, and dark too. Now it's dark by 4 pm, which is quite an adjustment. I'm used to darkness signaling the end of the day, but now there is still 7+ more hours of DAY left after it gets dark before it's time to wind down, so you can't just shut down when it gets dark and quit being productive. However, candles make it cozy, and i think Swedes must go through more candles than any other country....when i walk down the street at night and glance through the windows of houses there are always candles burning at the kitchen table. And I am understanding better now why on a beautiful day, every person here heads outside to talk advantage of the sun and warmth....it's not an every-day experience.

There is still one apple tree in our garden here which is laden with apples still and putting up a worthy fight against the frosts. Erik and I have made a lot of äpplemås to freeze which will be gratefully eaten all winter in the mornings with yogurt and museli. We have been having fun lately, whether it's our daily routines or a weekend trip. He comes and plays with the kids and I often, and Alexander truly loves "ERIT!!" We read in the evenings, or he reads and I knit. I just plowed through 2 wonderful novels, Gap Creek and A Thousand Splendid Suns. The former set in rural SC 100 years ago and the latter taking place in modern day Afganistan. I highly recommend both. It's so amazing to travel the world through books and learn about different cultures and time periods. Erik and I just started a great new book together called Living Spirituality by Greg Laugherly of Swiss L'Abri. We also found a lovely international church here to attend, and it seems every Sunday there is a visiting pastor from Africa.....a couple weeks ago a man from Zimbabwe spoke, and it was hilarious to see his enthusiastic, flamboyant style translated into Swedish by a typical reserved, hands-in-his-pockets Swede. He tried his best, and it was certainly humorous. :)

Last weekend Erik and I heard an amazing concert by Anders Widmark, a pianist who takes old Swedish psalms and creates experimental jazz masterpieces out of them. We bought cheap student tickets but somehow landed on the front row, literally 8 feet from the piano and able to see every beautiful movement of his hands on the keys and see the almost pained expression on his face as he played. It was heaven for any piano-lover, and I had such a sense of the creativity that is flowing through this world and which, despite all the talk of a meaningless, random universe, seems to scream of purpose and beauty and source.

I miss all of you back home and think of you so often. In just over a month i'll be flying home for Christmas and will stay for a glorious 3 weeks. There is nothing like traveling, despite the exciting discoveries, to make one appreciate home and old relationships.